Friday, June 6, 2008

Death by Windshield

In a sad and rare occurrence, we regretably announce the passing away of the Gnat family. Born in small pond just outside of Tombstone, AZ (the irony is not lost on the investigators), Phil and Maggie Gnat married in the Spring of '08 after meeting at the local watering hole. They made plans to move on up to the East side, but they were cut short for Maggie was expecting. With 12 little ones on the way, Phil and Maggie decided it would be best to stick around their extended family. With Phil working as the head supervisor at the local Pest Control Center and Maggie at home taking care of the nest, things looked promising. It has been rumored that the Gnat family was on their way to the Larvapalooza show outside Tucson. Officials are unsure at this moment whether their death was an accident or not, but one official who spoke under the name of anonymity remarked, "With such a large family and the economy the way it is, I wouldn't be surprised one bit to hear that it was a mass suicide." A Gnat family relative was unavailable for comment. In lieu of flowers or small puddles of murky water, donations are being accepted at the Team Xtreme4 website.



1 comment:

  1. I read this post to my roommate. She thinks you have too much time on your hands. lol. I tried to assure her that wasn't the case case but... to no avail.

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